Thursday, September 11, 2008

i❤hvayn™ - Long Time No See

hmm...its been quite some time since i wrote a post in this blog...the school's internet sever was down; cable got robbed..haha...so, couldnt post one...anyway, things are getting worser, it seems like, between me and him..maybe its because of exam, his trial is this week, but even so, couldnt he at least smile at me when he walk through the toilet's lane??just took ONE glance and walked away..W.O.W...it really left me speechless and tears started to circle around my eyeballs...i dont want to cry, maybe he isnt doing it on purpose, but i cant keep lying to myself like this...i hate this situation, Sarhan, i really hate it....please dont treat me like this...its our 5 months tomorrow...its not an easy task to acheive between us, because of our situation...im really glad we came this far but i wan everything to continue and last for ever...thats what i really want...i wonder how can i make him realise that i really hate being like a stranger to him...lover to stranger, thats a big difference, mind that...i dont want my feeling to go away....but i cannot stand it this way...im not your superwoman, darling...im not the kind of girl, that you can let down, and think that everythings O.K...we dont talk the way we used to talk, nor being in love like we used to...and its hurting me so....im being strong all the way, because im always hoping that im the one who's thinking tooo toooo tooo tooo much....but even my friends can see the change in you, not only me...Baby, I am only human...This girl needs more than occasional hugs as a token of love from you to me...please tell me this is just for the moment....just for a short short while, because my strength is going out, bit by bit....haiz...im going home tomorrow...he's not though...normal for form5...by the way, congratulations hubby!!11A1 for his last trial...hehe...thats who i call my BABY!!!maybe all that we sacrifice ; time and etc..is really worth it...i dont mind if he puts his studies in front of me, because to me SPM only occurs once in a lifetime...however, im sometimes i really feel im insignificant...how??how can i solve this problem?its really serious...for me...but maybe not for him...i know that...he told people that he doesnt want to think of love now..then why would he want to still be in a relationship with me??a big question which always pop in my mind, but no one actually knows how terrible it feels...i love you!!!!!!i really really love you...please come back, sarhan....

ViviaN
i❤hvayn™

No comments: